1995
AVRO Club Championships 1995
AVRO Club Championships
Last modified: 01/14/2015 21:23:32
Version 2.5.1
"WHERE IS RJ!?!" "Where is the COWARD!?!" My shrieking scatter the doctors, like frightened chickens. My wrath, unlike what cloning has left of my masculinity, is an fearsome thing to behold.
The battle was a humiliation. RJ did not even have the decency to appear. My frustration at his absence was immediately felt by my opponents when I rammed my cycle head-on into another right from the start. Disabled, I leapt from my cycle and drew my hatchet. Nothing would stop me from tasting blood that day, or so I thought. As I closed in on my chosen victim, a concussion grenade knocked me to the ground. Stunned, I could only inch my way towards my victim. More grenades came, but still I inched on. Thermites lit me fire, but still I inched. When I finally made a foot, a grenade finished my burning form off.
Still searing with impatience, I reach out of my cloning chamber and drag the nearest doctor close to my face. Panting from even this exertion, my fetid breath begins to steam his glasses. Immediately, the doctor turns green with nausea. In gasping breaths, the doctor tells me that my agents went to the sewer rat's place, but could only recover his beloved stuffed bear, Boom.
Tossing the leach aside, I demand the prize. Quivering hands offer it to me, and I snatch it . It is soft, cuddly brown bear with warm heart-shaped eyes and a cute little smirk. The same smirk I have seen on RJ!!! I order the pathetic fools to leave me and bear alone.
My frustration mounts... RJ may not have killed me this time, but it was still his fault! He was the cause of my humiliating death that day! I have been denied the blood of RJ again! Swearing my vengeance, I tear the head off his beloved toy and dash it to the floor. A plinking metallic sound when it hits causes me to look down. There, I see a handle, like the ones seen on grenades. With shocking realization, I look down at the now headless bear in my hands.
BOOM!
R.J. was unable to make the game, so J.S. won the battle. As you might have guessed, Bruce did not fair too well in this arena.
| Created by: | J.S. | Date Created: | January 4, 1995 |
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| Statistics: | Cost: | $9,999.40 |  |
| Weight: | 1,299.25 lbs. |
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| Handling Class: | 2 |
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| Top Speed: | 120.0 mph |
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| Acceleration: | 15 |
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| Body: | Heavy Cycle, Hvy. Suspension, Cycle Windshell |
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| Wheels: | 2 PR SB Tires, 2-10 pts. Cycle Wheelguards |
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| Engine: | 100 cid GE, 3 gallon HD Tank | ||
| Weapons: | Machine Gun |
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| Accessories: | SWC, No Paint Windshield |
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| Armour: | 17 pts. Sloped Plastic Armour, 10 pts. Cycle Windshell armour, 10 pts. CA around driver, 10 pts. CA around engine & tank | ||
| Driver: | 50 lbs. Driver, Body Armour, ABV, 7 Ex. Grs.,
2 Thermite Grs., 1 Concussion Grs., 3 Impact Fuses, Hatchet,
Grenade Launcher, 1 Sling |
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The Division 10 cycle battle consisted of 3 opponents: Bruce, JS and AE. Points were awarded for firepower or maneuver killing each other (5 pts). In the end, the point spread was: JS = 0 pts., AE = -5 pts. and Bruce = -5 pts.
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Bruce and AE were heading towards one another right from the start of the race. Right after the required no-firing-or-ramming period, they collided into one another. They both had mistakenly thought that the other would move out of the way. This resulted in both of their front wheels being destroyed.
Bruce jumped out of his vehicle while AE stayed in his. JS, amused by his good fortune, remained a good distance away and lobbed grenades at the two. Bruce was knocked out by a concussion grenade and was killed 4 or so grenades later after being set on fire.
AE valiently tried to hit off JS with his handgun, but the power of JS's grenades won out.
Bruce died a humiliating death again. Silliness prevailed. A typical AVRO battle. However, Bruce does get closer to killing RJ in the Regionals.
The Parking Arena is available for viewing in the Arenas section.
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Reprinted by the Seattle
Washington Autoduel Team, January 20, 2015
Updated January 21, 2015
Original URL: http://avro.simplenet.com/carwars/reports/1995_club.html